maybe a quarter-life crisis
We missed CR on Monday because my parents had a Labor Day dinner, complete with burgers and games, with the Scholzs and the Gregorys, and we really couldn't miss that. It was a lot of fun, but I'm a bit bummed about missing CR. Oh well--next week. We did have a good time at the potluck, playing Pit and eating a frickton of delicious food. It's nice to be making friends with people with whom we can be real.
Meeting Fuat at Starbucks for Turkish practice was an absolute blast. I was super nervous beforehand ("Oh man I don't know very much conversational Turkish he's going to think I'm so dumb"), but my fears were for naught. We sat and talked for an hour and a half while Alan watched the Texas-Rice game (Hookem!). I learned so much and took extensive notes, and he asked me questions about colloquial English, and it was very laid-back and enjoyable. I've never met anyone before who spoke Turkish, and it was exhilarating to finally get to share my love of the language with someone. We're going to continue meeting, if we can get our schedules in sync.
While looking at Facebook today, I saw "25 dakika önce" on someone's status ("25 minutes ago") and thought, "Wait, how did my Facebook language get switched back to English?". Then I realized that it's still in Turkish, I'm just so used to it that I didn't realize it.
Played at Cedar Ridge with Daddy on Sunday (and this is the last time for real, I think?), which was fun even though we had to get up early. We went to Napoli's with my family (and Nikki and Blake) afterward. That evening we had Foundations for the first time in forever, and it went really well; we talked about a lot of marriage-related stuff and we came away from it feeling stronger in our relationship with God and each other. Everyone went to I Heart Yogurt afterward and it was yummy.
School has been going remarkably well. I aced my first (incredibly easy) quiz on Oedipus. I've made friends with the guy who sits next to me, Ryan. Our teacher let us out of class early today. All kinds of good stuff.
Tuesday night we had Nikki and Blake over for the evening. We played Hearts and Sequence and watched the Shawshank Redemption. We were up way later than we should have been, but it was worth it.
Miscellaneous; I've been making a habit of taking Imma on walks, and it's been nice to get to know our neighborhood, get outdoors, and get Imma some exercise. I caught up with a friend who had some really big news that I'm not allowed to share yet. Also, crazy weather lately--tropical storms and tornados and then wait all of a sudden it's sweltering again. That's Texas for you. Also, Bee may be transferring to public school soon, so be praying for a smooth transition there.
I keep resolving to talk less about yoga (because I know it's not as interesting to everyone else as it is to me), but I keep reaching new milestones and wanting to document it. So as long as new things keep happening, I'm going to keep writing about it. Just skip the next paragraph if you want.
- I got into side crow for the first time today, as well as the variation with the scissored legs. I need to work on straightening my arms, but I'm pretty proud of myself for getting into it as a beginner. They don't even teach it in the regular classes (only it 84 Asanas - more on that later).
- Sunstone had a "Day of Free Yoga," and Joanna, Saralynn, and Brittany Rodgers all came with me to a Fire class. It was a lot of fun to share this passion with friends.
- I took my first "Metal" class. It's the most difficult of the five standard classes (Fire, Wood, Earth, Water, Metal) and the only one I hadn't tried yet. I was nervous about trying it, since I kept hearing people talking about how hard it was, but I decided that if the worst possible consequence of trying something new is that my pride could be hurt, it's worth trying. As it turns out, it was very challenging, but not excessively so, and I had a great time. I'm planning to make Metal a part of my regular class rotation.
- Today I hit another milestone: two classes back to back. I've been going to class every day, but I'd never done two in the same day before. My class ran a little long and the instructor remarked that the next class would be starting in 6 minutes, and I spontaneously decided to stay for the next one. So I ended up doing two and a half hours of yoga and it totally kicked my butt. I'm glad that I did it, though, and it's good practice for the three-hour 84 Asanas class that I'm eventually going to attempt.
And if you've made it all the way through this unexciting entry, you're rewarded with some rare disclosure! My depression has been pretty bad recently. I say recently, and I mean for the past...I don't know, I can't remember it ever not being bad. At any rate, I'm going to see a doctor soon and possibly give medication yet another try. Any prayers for that would certainly be appreciated. I'm hopeful that things won't always be this way. For a long time, I've tried to take the "accept that things will probably always be this way and just learn how to cope" approach, but I can't live that way. Without hope I really have no chance of making it. Getting my hopes up means that I may be disappointed yet again, but it's hard to have hope without getting your hopes up.
Please pray, also, for my relationship with God. I'm becoming aware of a lot of anger that I have towards Him, and I want to let go of it so that I can be close to Him again. Without Him, I won't be able to get anywhere in this life. I miss Him. I need to work through my anger issue. (By the way, this is a completely emotional issue, not a logical one, so don't bother trying to explain to me why I shouldn't be angry. Instead, just pray.)
I think that's all for now.
"Remember joy isn't a stranger to you. You are winning and you are strong. Love. Love first, love always, love forever." - Anne Rice
“The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.” -Kahlil Gibran
Category: None
Jobe
Posted on September 10, 2010 at 12:41 AM
I love you. And I'll be praying for you. <3
P.S. I like that last quote.
Cameron
Posted on September 10, 2010 at 08:25 PM
Our we praying for Bee or the school? she might beat them all up.
It's awesome when you start to read in another language and don't even realize it. I started to do that in Spanish before I passed the class and never looked back.
Always praying gin. And remind me, because I forget sometimes.
dorkamus
Posted on September 10, 2010 at 10:56 PM
don't stop sharing about yoga! i love to hear about it. it encourages me to hear your progress. and i'm proud of you for dedicating yourself.
that IS a really long stretch of yoga.
holy cow. you're an intense little woman.
YAY for Turkish, that's so awesome. I hope to be as progressed with Hungarian in a year, Lord-willing.
i love you, sweet girl. i will pray!
jodely1
Posted on September 12, 2010 at 03:05 PM
IDLMGGESVM <3
LauraO
Posted on September 16, 2010 at 08:45 PM
I finally located my password, and I just want you to know that I'm here and that I'll keep you in my thoughts. (hug)
Your final paragraph reminds me of one of my favorite encounters is all of fiction. Dream has engaged in a shapeshifting duel to get something back. His opponent has him seemingly backed into a corner, saying "I am the darkness, the crushing end of everything, etc. What then will be you be."
And Dream gives a very small smile and says "I am hope."
It's...it may seem trite, and it's a small moment, but that enduring hope reminds me of you.